Howondaland

Chapter 7. Lina.

After
yesterday’s downpour it became noticeably colder and I wrapped myself in an old
jacket more forcefully. I still could not
stand it and fled Anna from the apartment. The
strength to remain in it was not perfect, especially when I remembered last
night. When
I remembered her, I blushed so that the whole body felt hot. At
night, Denis finally slipped from the couch, stretched out on the carpet and
did not even wake up when I slipped him a pillow under his head and covered his
blanket. After
a moment’s thought, I climbed up to him under the blanket and happily felt him
hug me in a dream. He
slept soundlessly, only a hot breath burned my cheek.
What happened with me? Is
it possible to do this?.. We just slept, but I still felt like a terrible
debauchery, although, probably, it was?.. All the same, I’m a very bad person. From all these thoughts, my
brain began to boil. Therefore,
in the morning, without waiting for Denis to wake up, I escaped.
The
cold air chilled me a bit and it was even easier to breathe. I
decided to return home to my sister, although I realized that she was unlikely
to be happy with my return.

**
My
sister opened the door as quickly as if she were already waiting for me. But
she did not let me into the apartment, and I realized with sadness that she
would do anything, so long as I did not cross the threshold.
— And why did you come? — she asked viciously.
-You kind of went with that woman with such
pleasure.
-I want to go home,— I tried not to pay
attention to her rude tone.
— Is it bad there? Beat, rape,
humiliate? If
not, better go back there.
I could not believe my ears. Yes,
my sister never really loved me, always believed that I stole her mother’s
love, for some reason blamed me for my father’s death, but I could not even
think that she would drive me out of our apartment. Well, at least
until my majority …
—
Katya, but it’s wrong that I live with strangers! —
I tried to reach her mind, but she looked at me with empty eyes and was silent.
I
grabbed her hand, but she pushed me away and I painfully bumped my shoulder
against the wall. Tears came
to my eyes. Well,
what did I do wrong in this life to deserve this? Sister quickly
ran into the apartment and slammed the door. Judging
by the noise, she also began to move the cabinet to the door, so I did not
exactly break into home …
I slowly left the entrance. And where should I go now? I
do not want to return to Anna’s apartment, my sister does not let me into my
home, and that, I still have to find some bridge and live under it? I
furiously rubbed my fist with my eyes and realized that I could not stop the
tears. So
I’ll go and die now somewhere, let my sister be tormented
conscience when he finds out. I moved forward, not
seeing the road from tears. And
it’s no wonder that I immediately crashed into some man.
— I’m sorry,— I muttered, and tried to round
him, but I felt the man’s hand grab my shoulder. I
was startled by fright and I was ready to scream and break out, but for a start
I decided to spit at him. And she stopped when she saw
Denis in front of him. What is he
doing here? How did he
understand where I left and where does he know my address? Although, he
could get an address from Ani, but that does not change anything! He came for me? What
for?
— Annoying,— he suddenly said,
and pressed me to him. I
sobbed and finally burst into tears, like a child.

**
In
his car, I cried a long time, curled up in a ball in the backseat. Denis melancholy
sat behind the wheel, drawing in a notebook. I
was even glad that he did not come to me with consolations, and what could he
tell me? What’s all good? I did not see
anything good in my situation.
Finally, I was exhausted. Forces
no longer cry, and I pulled the jacket over my head, because I suddenly felt
terribly ashamed before the man. Suddenly,
oh yeah. When we
slept side by side, I did not have this feeling.
I
heard him start the car and we went somewhere. It
seems that I dozed off with heat and even motion sickness, because when Denis
shook me by the shoulder, I did not immediately realize where I was.
— Come on, let’s go,— he pulled me out of the car and gave me
his hand. I
looked at him doubtfully, but still held out his hand to him. Denis
stroked my head reassuringly and silently walked through the park.
— How does it turn out, Denis, that the
native person hates you? —  I
suddenly asked. —
My sister always hated me,
but I did not expect that to the extent that she was ready to drive me out of
the house.
The
man looked at the sky and answered, pausing:
—
Sometimes family ties do not mean good relations … alas.
I stared at him. There
was so much depression in Denis’s voice that it suddenly occurred to me that
his family was not even mentioned casually. What
do I know about him, except his name, age, and the fact that he is an artist?
I
opened my mouth to ask, but he shook his head warningly.
— Do not ask about my family. Perhaps I will tell myself. Anya, too,
will not tell, do not ask her questions.
— Think!

I wrenched my
hand and walked away from him quickly. Also, I, secrets, but I
wanted to spit. For everyone! Where is the
nearest bridge under which I will live?
Behind
me, I heard footsteps — Denis caught up with me and crushed me in an armful.
— Sorry, Lina, I really dislike this topic. Do not get mad.
— I’m not angry,— I sighed. —
Today is a stupid day, and in general … I do not want to live with Anya, I’m
a stranger there and I feel uncomfortable. What should I do, Denis?

Denis.

— What should I do, Denis?
—  Lina
asked and looked at me wide-eyed. Does she really
think I know the answer?
When
I did not find her in the apartment in the morning, I immediately understood
where the girl had gone. And blew up for her, because?.. Why? Did not want her to come home? Decided for her that she
should be around? I
never thought that I was suffering from pedophilia, but when I met Lina, I
realized that I did not see her as a teenager, but just a small woman. Which, in addition, needs
protection. And
why do not I become her protector?
I coughed.
—
You know, I needed a person who would hurt me for a long time if I work more
than two days in a row. Anya
with the beginning of autumn will rarely be at home, so you do not want to take
this responsibility on yourself?
— Are you kidding?—  she stretched out and tears flashed in her eyes
again. —
Of course, I’m only sixteen and you can scoff at me as much as you like …
— I do
not really have any sense of humor,—  I
grinned. —
But I really need such a person.
— You’d rather
marry,— she muttered. —
I will feel like a nanny with such an adult man.
— I must marry,— I
hugged her. — But a little
later.
Lina
blushed and put her face in her hands.
Oh, yes, Denis,
you’re just a master of courtship. But
the most interesting is that I think I’m really ready for this.

We
continued to walk for a long time, until the clouds ran up and began to drizzle
up a small and nasty rain. When
the door slammed behind the girl in Anna’s apartment, I thought, maybe I should
have kissed her? But I decided
that there was no need to rush things.
 For some time I was
happy.

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