Chapter 18.
A
month later. Lina.
I chatted with a mug of tea, carefully examining how the brown liquid beats
against the walls.
On the street stood the end of August and already felt autumn. It’s funny, last
August was the beginning, and this one seems to be the end of everything. Denis
never remembered me, and although I continued to live with him, I understood
that this could not continue. Every morning I got up in the hope that the
memory would return to the man and every evening crying in the pillow, because
this did not happen. Denis walked gloomy and tried to spend more time with me,
but it was all wasted.
I sighed convulsively. In the courtyard there was night, my head ached and all
these gloomy thoughts only aggravated the pain. But still, still …
A heavy hand fell on my shoulder and I shuddered in surprise. Behind me stood
Denis and yawned desperately.
— I woke you up? — I was ashamed, however, not very much.
He shook his shaggy head and suddenly buried his face in my shoulder. I felt
his hot breath on my skin and suddenly even blurted out for myself:
— Denis, with the beginning of classes I want to leave from you.
Like this. I thought for a long time how to say it to him, waited for the right
moment, and told all quite by accident.
He froze and without raising his head, said:
— Do you want to leave me?
— Do not quit, — I said hurriedly. —
It’s just … I’m constantly
looming in front of your eyes and you’ve become very sad … maybe that you
will not see me every day, will help you? I understand that only a month has
passed and I do not ask you to remember me right now, but I can see that this
is bad for you.
The man finally lifted his head and looked into my eyes.
— Will it be better this way? — he said thoughtfully. — I don’t know. However, if you want to check …
I nodded and pressed myself against his chest. His heart was beating like
crazy, why? I took his hand in mine, long considering the thin fingers. Denis
rubbed his unshaven cheek against my hair and took a deep breath. As if nothing
happened and everything is as before.
His fingers ran over my shoulder and I said emphatically:
— Come on.
— Where, Lina? — he smiled.
— To the bedroom, Denis. And just do not give me a
damn!
**
We lay in bed for a long time. What was the man thinking about? He frowned, but
was silent.
Sex was without the usual tenderness that Denis gave me, with a feeling of
aching pain in my chest. Just sex. Probably, for many years the man has got
used to such?
— I’m sorry, Lina, — he finally said. —
It should not have happened
at all. But, tell me … what if you start from the beginning?
— At first? — I did not understand.
— Yes. I’ll call you on dates, take you to the movies … what else do people
usually do? You really are very cute to me, Lina. But I’m afraid that I will
not remember you. But is not it just that I fell in love then?
— All right,— I said, fascinated. How else could I answer?
He smiled and suddenly fell back on me.
— It’s still a long way to the morning,— he whispered, and I closed my eyes and wrapped
his arms around his neck. And silently said that Denis should not hear:
— I love you.
Howondaland 