Howondaland

Part 15.
15 years ago. Denis.

I hissed and threw Anna’s hand away from my face.
— Enough. You’ve been messing with me for half an hour, but this stuff is
getting stuck.
— Do you want blood poisoning? — she snorted, but stopped smearing. — How did
you even manage to fight?
— The fight? — I raised an eyebrow and grimaced. — Three on one, do you
think it’s a fight? The only thing I did was defend my hands. Thank you, that
your parents took me at least for the New Year, I’ll live peacefully for a
couple of days.

Anya heaved a deep sigh. Probably, her parents had a good row before my
arrival. My uncle disliked me, although he did not tell me this in person, but
it was obvious. But I was glad of any respite and the opportunity to
communicate with the only person who does not repel me.
I threw my gaze into the mirror and sat down on Anna’s bed with a swing. Yeah,
it’s impossible to spoil me and I can not spoil, as I was a freak, and I
stayed.

— You know, it’s all bitching wildly for me. I’m hated in the orphanage, at
school … so what, my father hated me. Will it ever stop? You’re the only
person who treats me well, but I do not know, maybe it’s because you were
forced to communicate with me from childhood and you just got used to it?
— Denis, — the girl shook her head reproachfully. — You know that we’re
friends, and if you disliked me, I would not have been talking to you, no matter
how much my mother tried.
— Yes, probably …—  I turned away from
her.

Anya stroked my head and smiled.
— You’re awfully shaggy, but I like it.

I turned my head towards her and blushed. Her face was a couple of centimeters
from mine, too close for me. Naturally, in my sixteen I have never kissed, and
I doubted that I could like at least one girl.
Anya did not move away, and I decided to take a chance. Well, in which case,
she will not kill me?
The girl’s lips were soft and warm. She did not push me away, but I myself
staggered back from Ani.
She ran a finger over her lips, then smiled.
— You’re still such a virgin, Denis.
I got angry. It’s easy for her to say that, she’s already met other guys. I
approached her again and grabbed the girl with my hands, firmly pressing Anya
to me. She did not break away. Red hair tickled my face, the smell of my body
circled my head and, it seems, I completely lost touch with reality.
Thin hands climbed under my sweater and I completely disappeared.

She is. Must. Be. Mine.
**
The blow to the breath was evil and short. The pain did not come immediately, only
it became impossible to breathe, and, for a few moments, I thought I would
suffocate.
My famous success — of course, the girl’s parents did not return on time.
Anna’s father dragged me off the bed and pressed me against the wall, squeezing
my neck to a crunch. Red spots swam before my eyes and I realized that I was
losing consciousness right now. My fingers cramped, and blood ran from nose.
And then I again had the opportunity to breathe and collapsed onto the carpet.
A kick came flying in the ribs. I sucked in air through clenched teeth, trying
to stay on the border of consciousness and could not. It was dark and finally
quiet.

I woke up pretty quickly. The body hurt, but to the pain I was quite familiar,
so I did not pay attention to it.
The weeping Anne sat beside me on the floor and sighed convulsively.
— Hey,— I croaked, — are you all right, Ann?
She looked at me and grabbed my arm.
— I … I’m fine with you, and you, Denis?
— It will pass …— I struggled to get
up and reached for my jeans. On the stomach and ribs, bruises developed. I
sighed. Everything has its price, right? But I can be calm — I will not die a
virgin any more.
— Papa on the balcony, my mom calms him … Denis, you’d better go. — She
stroked my cheek and jabbed her head against my shoulder. — Forgive my father,
Denis …
I hugged the girl, but did not stop. In the corridor I got a quick kiss and I
left the apartment.

I met Ana the next time a year later, when we were both in university. Without
any foreword, we collapsed into bed and for many years turned into lovers.

**
At the university, I also did not have a conversation, although classmates
sometimes talked to me, but still I was lonely. But it was not important. Anya
was always there for me and that was enough for me.

**
Eight years ago.
— Anya … will you marry me?
A brief silence. Not so I imagined it …
— No. I’m sorry, Denis, but no. You’re very good and I love you … But I can
not marry you. And it’s better for us to remain friends … as before.
And I agreed, because at that time I absolutely could not imagine life without
it. Later, all feelings for Ana faded away, only friendship and sex remained.

**
Present time.
— How old are you?
— Thirty.
— What is your occupation?
— I teach … a free artist.
— Are you married or dating?
— No…

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