Howondaland

Chapter 13.
December 30. Lina.
After
a couple of hours I rose resolutely and went to Denis. Damn it, I do not care
about his past. I need it
now.
I found a man in the
workshop. Where
else … I wonder why after all he did not quit drawing?
Denis
lay on the floor in headphones, closing his eyes and tapping his fingers in the
rhythm of the music. Of
course, I did not think that he would lie and cry, but he did not expect such
calmness from him.
I
lay down next to her and pulled out one earpiece — it’s still interesting that
he listens.
* And the mercy
seat is waiting

And I think my
head is
burning* — an invisible singer broke forth.
— You’re listening to a garbage, — I sighed.
—
The garbage itself, — Denis insulted like a child, and pulled off the
headphones, staring at me expectantly.
— Why did not you quit drawing? — I
suddenly asked.
He raised
an eyebrow, then smiled.
— Had tried. When
I got into the orphanage, I was so happy that I did not draw a whole week. And then he got up at night
in a dream and sat down to draw. Then I tried
again a couple of times, but you see the result myself. Probably, there are things
that do not change. So or…
— Or what?
— Lina, — he
covered my warm palm with my hand. — Do you understand that
I’m not a strong man? I
can never hit the table with my fist and everyone will obey me at once. I can not even overcome
myself.
I did not say anything. I understood all this perfectly. Denis
knelt before me and took my head in his hands. From
the warmth of his hands, I felt dizzy and swam around.
-I’m literally shaking with the thought that I’ll ruin your life,- he said sadly. — But without you I can not imagine what to
do. Therefore,
for the first time in my life I will do as I want, without looking at someone
else’s opinion.
He
ran his finger over my lips, and then pulled the sweater off me sharply.

Denis.
I
gently squeezed the girl’s breasts, slowly kissing her back. Never before
had I wanted any of the women so much. I
hardly suppressed the desire to enter into it without any sentiment, but I did
not want her to remember her first sex so much.

Fondle her, listening with pleasure to the
interrupted breath of Lina. Leaned
my cock against her buttocks, slowly moving hips, feeling the girl tremble. Tugged
fingers with her tiny hard nipples, reveling in Lina’s excitement.
—
Denis, — she said hoarsely, — Denis …
I
neatly put the girl on her back and pressed her lips to her belly, descending
lower and lower. She
screamed and squeezed her legs.
— Do not be afraid, Lina… — I whispered. The
girl pulled me by the hair and I got up on elbows and buried my face in the
girl’s collarbone, inhaling the smell of her body. She
stroked me on the back, and for the first time in my life I did not flinch when
other people’s hands touched my scars. And I realized that I
can not wait any longer.
I leaned on
Lina, covering her with my body. She was so small,
fragile and completely mine. I
spread knee to her legs, slipped one arm under her back and held the girl
tightly to herself. Lina
took a deep breath and clung her fingers to my shoulders.
And I entered it.

**
For a
long time I kissed her tear-stained eyes and wet cheeks. She
smiled through tears, but I could not get out of my head screams and quiet
crying. I
knew that I would blame myself even for this, but when I remembered about sex,
a shiver ran through my body and I again wanted to Lina. Again and again.
-I’m glad that you became my first man, — the
girl said thoughtfully. She
pressed her cheek to my chest, tickling her mysterious patterns with her
fingers. —
I just did not think it would be like this … but will not this pain be the
same every time?
—
No, — I whispered, — then it will be very, very good … and … forgive me,
Lina. I…I love you.
I was embarrassed. I
do not know how I got it out, but Lina laughed, and I was pleased to hear her
say after me:
— I love you,
Denis.

**
I opened my
eyes sharply and jumped on the bed. Is it that I dreamed everything? The room was dark and cold. I
slowly reached out and turned on the lamp on the bedside table. Then I turned
around slowly and sighed with relief. Lina
was asleep, curled up in a ball, and frowned in displeasure from the light.
—
Lina, — I whispered, — oh, Lina, my girl …
— Five more minutes,— she muttered sleepily
and tried to pull the blanket over her head. I
grinned, turned off the light, covered the girl with a blanket and ducked
towards her. Now
I know for sure what happiness is.

It’s not the end!

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